How to Regain Staying Power When Stressed
Let’s face it — life is full of stressors, challenges and situations that simply can’t be controlled. And often times, those things become triggers to people’s actions (or reactions, rather). Despite the fact that many people seek a perfection in some way or another, stress and difficult situations are not really things that can be entirely avoided in the real world. Instead of trying to resist the fact that challenges sometimes arise, Justin Thorstad encourages people to look within and hold strong to their staying power when challenged.
It’s important, he says, to try to reframe a situation when a challenge arises. Looking within can help people regain peace and clarity when faced with stressors. Understand that these types of situations are often placed before people to help teach them, and they can often looked back upon as some of life’s greatest gifts. But, realistically, they may not seem that way in the moment. That’s why Justin shares a personal experience of his own and suggests the following tips:
“Recently, I experienced an entire week where I was feeling stressed every single day. I was met with challenges that were stressful in nature and found myself getting triggered and feeling a lot of tension and resistance,” he explains. “Once I got to the weekend, I gave myself a chance to sit with it and try to figure out why… How is this here for me?”
He says he realized that he himself was perpetuating some of these challenging situations by focusing all his attention on and investing his energy in them. He says when people are faced with a problem, it’s a good idea to ask why they aren’t okay with having a problem. Simply recognizing that it’s okay to have a problem, and reframing the mind to see it as an opportunity, can help people get through it and regain control of how they see the situation. That in itself can be more impactful than the situation itself. When people reframe a problem as an opportunity, they’ve already started to solve the problem.
“Things aren’t always going to be smooth and effortless and perfect,” Justin says. “So when you notice that things aren’t going exactly your way and it’s stressing you out, ask yourself why you aren’t okay with there being a problem.” Then he suggests giving the mind a chance to reframe the situation and create a new model for how to handle it. “See how you can transcend that and work out of the resistance.” He notes that problems are there for us and even if the answers aren’t always immediate, the practice of how people respond to problems can help make them less stressful. “If we continue to practice reframing, we will eventually see that these things happening to us are actually gifts.”
When a challenge arises with another person, Justin also advises people not to get triggered by other people’s actions or decisions. This in itself can be a way of giving up control of one’s own mind. “You can’t stop being from having an opinion of you, but you can control how you feel about you,” he says, adding, “Never give your staying power away to someone who may simply be trying to take something from you.”
Admittedly, doing so takes practice, but he adds that being whole and complete does take continual effort.
When life gets stressful or upsetting, Justin advises people to use those situations so see how they can take those challenges and respond to them from a more elevated conscious. This can be done through simple awareness. He suggests rather than immediately responding to a stimulus, to literally lean back and try to detach from the emotions of the situation and remain objective. From there, create some time to process it introspectively, get clear headed, retain the staying power and then respond powerfully and in control of the response.
“Remember that you are not your emotions. Try to put that into practice and see how that changes you,” Justin says. “It’s a case of viewing something objectively, simple as a witness without judgment. Allow this time to discover more about your internal state and don’t be afraid to change yourself in order to change the way you respond to things. If it doesn’t serve you, choose differently.”
In today’s world full of challenges and stressors, Justin advises people to create some space before reacting. Instead, after some time to process it without emotion, the problem should seem less triggering and more manageable.